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Poems
Your Mind Is In Conflict
(February/'47 / Connecticut, USA)

Your Mind Is In Conflict

Poem By Lawrence S. Pertillar

You say you want the weight you carry gone.
Yet you turn around to put that weight back on.
With the missing of it craved,
Like an addict needing a fix...
To become enraged if the doing isn't quick.

You say you're tired of being left alone.
But it is a loneliness you condone.
To express relationships are not your 'thing'.
But you are heard to wish for a companion,
Prayed to God to bring with preferences you list.

You panic like a child having a tantrum fit,
When you are not the subject of an attention to get.
With the missing of it craved,
Like an addict needing a fix...
And has become crazed!

Your mind is in conflict but you refuse to admit this.
You wish to be abused and you do it to solicit.
You want someone to comprehend and understand your thoughts!
But what you need is a psychiatrist,
And one that is immediately sought.

'You're just saying that because you find me desirable.'

No.
I say that because I fear for my life.
The candlelight dinner you prepared was nice.
However...
Being threaten with a knife to be intimate with you,
Is something I can't accept...
As an appropriate approach to having a romantic evening.

'You're just like the others,
Who believed something was wrong with me.'

You're kidding.
I don't know 'where' they got that idea.
But, I want you to know this...
I have a tracking device on my cell phone.
And if you don't move away from the door,
It will be activated.

'You're just saying that because you find me desirable.'

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