Turnip Swan was born in the suburbs of New York City in the harsh, cold winter of January 1985. Growing up, Turnip lived in a cardboard box. When it rained, the box turned into a lump and forced Turnip to seek shelter under her favorite bridge. This went on until Turnip was 13 and employed her amazing talent of singing to land her a record deal in the Bahamas. She has lived there ever since and greatly enjoys her job, but has taken up poetry as well for inspiration. Turnip also enjoys knitting. She is desperately in love with all testicles, but especially Allen James Saywell's. She hopes to marry him someday in the near future.